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Words that have a different meaning when you become a teacher.

Well, I know i'm still a baby when it comes to my teaching career, but there are words and phrases that have a completely different meaning to me now and for the fun of it I thought I would share a few.

Poker Face: Thank you, young lad, for passing gas during my very quiet whole class lesson. All the kids burst out into laughter and here I stand with a straight face remaining composed and calm. Such skill.

Prep Time: The time required to get everything ready for a meal? Nope. The 30 minutes you get each day as a teacher to "prep" lessons. This time in reality is spent using the restroom, stuffing face with M&M's, getting homework ready, and watching the clock because 30 minutes is NEVER long enough to get any "prepping" done.

Butt: Yes, the thing otherwise known as your "pockets" in elementary school. I once made the terrible mistake of saying to my kiddos, "Sit your butt on the ground please." Turns out butt is still not acceptable to say to 7 year olds. For now i'll stick with, "Please have a seat on your pockets." Also, at least once a day I get a smarty pants who feels obligated to let myself and the class know that he/she is wearing sweat pants today and doesn't have any pockets. Really?

Princess Crown: The best $1 I ever spent. Whenever I'm doing small reading groups or working one-on-one with a student I wear my Princess Crown and the students are not allowed to ask/tell me anything unless they are bleeding, ill, or a case of bullying is happening. It's been magical.

Power Position: We in the teaching profession are trying to stray away from saying "Indian Style" or "Criss-Cross Apple Sauce" when we want the students to sit on the rug/carpet. For obvious reasons I totally understand. In my class Power Position means sitting straight with your legs crossed, on your pockets, and mouth closed. It's a beautiful thing.

Lunch: Time spent eating a meager meal of PB&J or leftovers. This time can be made more useful if you sit with other staff members. This time is also spent staring at the clock and groaning just a little bit when it's time to pick the kids up. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but the last half of the day always goes by the slowest.

Art: Oh you mean coloring? Sadly, our school doesn't have an art teacher this year so it's up to me to incorporate art into my weekly schedule. I wish I could say we do cooler things, but watercolors are the most creative thing we've done.

Pencils: Right. That thing that is never sharp enough. I'm quite certain my right arm is now stronger than my left arm because of all the pencils I sharpen. Why not have the kids do it you might ask? Basically, my kids aren't tall or strong enough to handle the old-fashioned pencil sharpeners. Who needs equally balanced arms anyways?

I'm sure there are a million more I could talk about. For the moment, that's all you get. I love my job. Each day I feel like it's finally proving my feelings of wanting to be a teacher and making differences to a child. Touching lives. Making memories. Growing up together. Teaching.


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