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Showing posts from March, 2013

I'm not giving up, I'm just starting over.

It's been 216 days.
In those 216 days I have finally and fully felt what it means to be homesick.
I just googled the definition of "homesick" and then I realized that the term is more complex than I thought. I feel a little concerned that I googled the word, so I won't bother to tell you my findings (plus if you really want to know you can google it yourself). I might not even be that homesick. Maybe I just miss certain things about my old life. I miss my kitchen and how I knew where everything was and where everything went. I miss the vacuum my parents got when they were married that they still use to this day. I miss my primary kids at church and how much they made me feel loved. Most of all, I miss the way I used to feel.

My poor mom has received countless phone calls these past week (more than our usual daily conversations) where I have cried (hard to admit) because Utah hasn't really felt like the home I expected it to be at this point. I have been living he…