Skip to main content

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness.

An hour. Maybe it was a little less than that. A matter such as this cannot be timed exactly. In the space of an hour I found myself again. It had to have been the weather. As a matter of fact I know that is was the weather. When the weather is like that you can't help but be overwhelmed by the goodness of life. I think it was the way the sun felt on my face. Or the way that the wind made perfect timing of intricate rhythm as it rustled the leaves on the trees. Maybe it was the feeling I got when I actually started reading a book for the first time in a long time. I know that it was a mixture of all of those things. You see, life is not always like this. Life for me lately has been a pretty dark place. When someone tells you that you don't even know who you are, that comes as a slap of extreme reality right in the face. Did I really not know who I was anymore? Had I lost all sense of my "Shelby?" I started to believe that I had. It was gone and honestly I didn't want to go look for it. As one of my new favorite songs says, "You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness." Saying that i was addicted to sadness is a bit extreme but I really didn't care anymore. In the space of an hour I found myself again. I am grateful to know that I can start over each new day. I am lucky and I am blessed.


Popular posts from this blog

BYU. Westmore. Anxiety. Family. Trusting. MY 5 YEARS IN UTAH.

For me, it’s usually night when all the feels start hitting and I get all sorts of nostalgic. August brings so many challenges for me in many ways. Once August hits it means summer is finally coming to an end and even though I’m usually ready to go back to work, the stress starts to creep in. Going into my 4th year seems bizarre. I don’t feel as if I’m a seasoned teacher, but since I’m not worried about the first day of school I think that says something. August also is the month where 5 years ago I took a big risk and moved to Utah. I left the comfort of my sweet southern home and stepped out on my own. Since 5 years seems like an eternity and a second all at the same time, I decided to write down the 5 most important things that have happened to me since I moved here.
1.Attending and graduating from BYU. I loved my time at BYU. I ran through my experience and I don’t regret that at all. I always knew the college lifestyle wasn’t for me, so getting through it fast was a blessing. I …

A Letter to Asher Rae.

Baby Asher,
Your momma is currently in labor and in a few hours you'll make your grand debut into this world. From the moment I knew you were coming I was in shock and how much my heart could grow. I work with sweet children all day and I love them so much. The love I already have for you is so different. You'll be the first grandchild of my parents, and you'll be my first ever niece. You're coming into a world that is incredibly hard and difficult. With your amazing parents in your life you'll be taught how to be strong and to be valiant in all circumstances. Your dad, my brother, is an excellent human being. He is dedicated, he is a dreamer, he is a hard worker, and he will be the most amazing father. Your mom is so beautiful. She is loving, she is patient, and she loves your dad so much. Your grandma, my mom, is SO excited for you. She will love you and spoil you, but she will also help you when things get hard. Your Grandma Forsyth is a tough woman. The toughes…

Coming to an end.

Considering my last post was in October, this morning I woke up and finally wanted to let the fingers type and do the talking. Since October my life has changed and I have grown so much. I always knew I wanted to be a teacher and I also always knew that I have both of my parents running through my blood. What this means for me is that I have this incredible drive to push myself to limits that haven't been set. My beautiful mother gave me passion for education. She constantly sets the example of the most excellent educator and one day I hope to be as successful as she is and was in the classroom. My mother gave me the realistic expectations that come with teaching, such as not always getting my way or having things work out in the way I would like them to. Bless her soul for being my constant supporter. My father gave me the drive to work hard and to never give up. He works construction and there hasn't been one thing that he hasn't finished once he set his mind to it. He …